Thursday, June 21, 2012
I was awoken by the sweet aroma of smoked opium wafting through the cold cave air where I found myself comfortably warm in a bed of soft, red satin and velvet pillows perfectly positioned to be hand fanned by two exotic looking jinni's smiling. There were beautiful hand crafted tapestries that decorated the ceiling and walls. The lit candles in the room made the shadows flutter as they fanned me smoothly. Italian marble tables held crystal vases that glistened full of wild orchids and gold angelic figurines playing harps in melodic harmonies. I felt wonderfully confused thinking, what have I done to deserve all of this exotic pleasure? Is this a gift, a dream, or have I died and gone to heaven? When I situp from my sleeping position a curtain is unveiled and in comes the Russian waiter spinning his platinum serving tray ornately decorated with hot coffee, fruit, juice, eggs Benedict and a huge ball of opium with all the necessary paraphernalia. Seeing that wild eyed sneer from the waiter jogged my memory a bit and realized I wasn't in heaven, but sure not in hell either. Not as of yet, anyway! I vaguely start to remember some of the previous events. As the waiter turns to leave I ask him, "What the hell happened last night? I blacked out from those margaritas." The waiter replies, "You created quite a stir last night." He yells, " You won big. You raped the 'executive game' and Mr. Cheney almost shot you in the face." "You won his jinni's in the final round of the blackjack game." "After you won you acted like a drunken fool and taunted him. He threw his cognac in your face and whipped out his Walther P.P.K." "Just as he took aim, Big Daddy rifled his raspberry Bartles & Jaymes and cracked Mr Cheney in his frontal lobe, knocking him out cold." "You were a very lucky man last night." "When you feel awoken and refreshed Big Daddy has ordered a sit-down with you. This time you might not be so lucky!"